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How To Help Someone Involved With A Narcissist

24 Sep A certain amount of time after the break-up — usually not long, when it comes to narcissists — your ex will find someone new. Whether you're happy they're out of your life or not, this can still be SEE ALSO: Some people can't help themselves from dating narcissists time and time again — here's why. What to do if you suspect someone you know is involved with a narcissist First of all let's cover the don't: * Do not underestimate how dangerous, manipulative and the narcissist will be involved in another relationship very quickly and will be on his best behaviour and doing everything he can to rub his ex victim's nose in it . Yet he also will dump them at their mother's house on his custodial days if he happens to have a date that night. And you are a man. Why is it that writers/ experts write as if the narcissistic ex is usually the man? My narcissistic ex-wife is making my life, and the lives of our three children, a destabilizing, living hell! I spent.

Not letting the drama and war take over YOUR lives is a struggle. It is something that took a while for my fiance and I to master. The hardest part is watching the kids struggle with their own pain, dealing with a mother they know is not quite right in the head, but having no idea what to do with that information.

Obviously the ex-wife has lost her marbles, right? I am not angry at them anymore, because I married her thinking her mother was evil. Our neurological make-up as humans makes us all vulnerable to that.

It's no one's dream to take on someone else's crazy ex, but if the alternative is not having my fiance and the kids in my life, then I'll take it. Thank you so much for posting this. I've been having such a hard time in my relationship which is basically the same thing you've written here. The only difference is that there is the added bonus of the crazy ex thinking that my boyfriend and I were sleeping together while they were still together she used to accuse him of sleeping with everyone under the sun because she is incredibly self-conscious.

Therefore, she decides she wants to threaten and harass me personally and involve her children in informing them that their father is a "scum bag" and his new girlfriend is a "whore" when they are only three and six years old.

Nothing I could do would help. They split due to her cheating with a guy. He has notified me that he wants to marry me now bc he found out how much he loved me when I started he No Contact. We cant go places and do things because of the kids behavior and that stinks for me and my daughter bc its like we "suffer" because of it.

It can be so much sometimes and just hearing that others are in similar situations is so relieving it makes me feel like I can muscle through it and maybe one day it will get easier. So thank you again for sharing. You seem like a very strong woman and I wish you the best! Shaila, so sorry you're dealing with that!

I'm going to throw some unsolicited advice at you though It's a very delicate task to correct kids when their bio parent tells them something awful about you. Especially with kids who are as young as your SO's. But, if it were me, when the kids bring it up, ask them if it's nice to call people names? They'll likely tell you that of course it's not nice.

I'm sure their parents have at least been able to teach them that much by now! But, those words their mom used, they aren't nice words, and I'd tell the kids that it's not ok to repeat them. I'd also probably tell the kids that when mommies and daddies break up, it's hard and it hurts a lot of feelings. Their mom is probably just still sad, and when people are sad, sometimes click the following article call other people names.

A big part of dealing with all of this is first us grownups learning on our own not to let our blood boil.

Dealing With A Difficult Ex & Your Kids

But look at the kids. Those poor creatures are caught in the middle. They love both of their parents. They only know what they're told, and when they're young, in these cases the crazy bios convince the kids of mean things. All you can do is correct that in age-appropriate ways. Explain in the simplest terms you can where those feelings are probably coming from, but that the kids can have their OWN feelings, and that's ok.

It does get better. Not all at once. But it does get better. This article really resonated with me! I am so glad you posted this.

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I've had such a hard time dealing with his crazy ex's bullshit and drama and it made me wonder if I should leave the relationship or not because of it He's absolutely great, and hes a great father, but she calls him asking for money, and takes the kids out of state without his permission, its horrible!

It causes him so much stress, he can barely afford to make ends meet. Wow, this was a breath of fresh air,as I have not met anyone else in my situation. I too am going through a similar mess.

Why Recovering From the Narcissist in Your Life Is So Hard | Psychology Today

It's gotten so stressful for me that I've thought if leaving would just be better because I know without his baggage, I wouldn't have to deal with drama, his 3 year old, the crazy wife hes still legally married but going through the divorce process and on top of everything, his PTSD he's a combat veteran.

He's a great person but I have asked if all this baggage is worth it and it sucks but I have to be honest, when all of this is going on more frequently I tend to feel some resentment toward him n the child and i know that's wrong.

I've never openly admitted that and I feel kind of bad for it but coming from someone who isn't big on kids, I'm trying to have a relationship with the kid and I've found myself getting close to her and even enjoying my time with her but the moment the crazy wife starts drama, n the child starts saying she doesn't like me cuz "mommy" doesn't like me it just makes me take a few steps back.

I think it's more frustrating because I feel like I have no one I can vent to who understands. I click this is an older post. I am trying to figure out if the baggage is worth it. Shes now been putting stuff in the kids head about us and me especially. Also, their child has ALOT of behavioral issues and she refuses to agree to get him help.

I have tried to reach out on other blogs but people just bash me when I say how i start to feel resentment towards their child.

Dating A Man With A Narcissistic Ex Wife

I also know its wrong, but you cant explain the feeling to others unless you are in the situation. We cant go places and do things because of the kids behavior and Dating A Man With A Narcissistic Ex Wife stinks for me and my daughter bc its like we "suffer" because of it.

We miss out on things bc of it. If you are ever up to having a venting session please let me know. Sofia you are so not alone. I debate with myself on a daily basis if my boyfriend's baggage is worth all the stress and drama.

His crazy ex just doesn't know when to stop and there is a cutie little two year old that I adore involved. The little one and I have a great relationship but I worry how that will be in a year or so because like your situation I know this crazy chic is going to bash me to the cutie.

I understand this web page my learn more here has to deal with her because of the little one but this chic uses the kid to text him everyday. Then she gets angry and uses the kid to get back at him. It is never ending. How much is enough? When do we say it is time to leave the drama?

These are questions I wrestle with on a daily basis. I hope things get better for you! Kind of sad to see others in the same boat! My boyfriends ex will call and text almost everyday because of the "baby" but still manages to call me awful names, and tell him how she wishes they could still be a family.

It's been over a year, and it feels like it's never going to end. I believe with border lines it will end. I'm in the same position and you really don't know what it feels like till you are here. It's nice to know I'm not alone. But still wish I knew how to handle it better. I went searching for an article to help me through dealing with my boyfriends crazy ex-wife who absolutely hates my guts.

We've been dating for a year and she still hasn't gotten used to the idea of me being around. Dating A Man With A Narcissistic Ex Wife won't let my boyfriend take their son out of her house, when he wants to see his son, he has to go to her house and see him there. He is only a baby, a little over a year and a half and it's sad that she won't let us take him because she doesn't want us to have the family she didn't. I've tried being understanding and explaining that I have so much love for her son, and that I understand she is his mother and I could never replace her.

But there is no communicating with the crazy. She just said "no matter how long she's around, the baby will never love her or give a fuck about her.

Dating A Man With A Narcissistic Ex Wife

She will always be nothing to him" which hurts. I buy him clothes, shoes, toys, etc which we can't tell her or she'd throw them awayand all I want is to love him because of the love I have for his dad. He is such a sweet little boy, it makes me sad she uses him for leverage against my boyfriend.

She makes him seem like a toy that is only Dating A Man With A Narcissistic Ex Wife, and no one is allowed to play with. It's very childish and annoying. It's such a hard spot to be in. Some days I'm confident and don't let her get to me, and other days I don't know how to keep dealing What Do When Your Ex Dating it. Being called a whore and a bitch, and any other name gets to be tiring. I get blamed for literally anything and everything that is wrong in her life.

Coming from a divorced family myself, I had no idea someone could be so manipulative and crazy in going through a divorce and custody battle.

My mom handled it way more gracefully. I'm catching up on comments so late here But I wanted to say at least this about your situation Megan The more you try and talk to your BF's ex, the more she's going to hate you right now. Because she's crazy and emotionally immature.

Since I've been in that situation, what worked for me was to disengage from the ex completely. Anything that needed to be said to her is said through my now husband. With regard to his visits with his kid He has the right to follow the visitation orders, and unless there is a stipulation in there about him having to have supervised parenting time, or unless there's a location specified, then he can exercise his time wherever he wants. It's up to your BF to flex his balls and put his ex in her place.

And sometimes that includes taking her to court for violating the parenting time agreement. Usually times in court for violations is enough.

For especially stupid or crazy ex's, you might have to go more times than that, and at that point the question of "Do we want to just apply for a change in custody?